30 is purdy

It's my birthday.

30 years ago today I was pushed forth from my mother's vaginal canal. And the world has never been the same since. (not saying I had anything to do with it. Just saying.)

I'm happy about a couple things.

1. My more veteran colleagues at school may no longer refer to me as just a 'pup' or just a 'baby' (not in the crying sort of way.) For the last 7 years of teaching I've heard, more than I can count, scores of my fellow teachers ask how old I am then follow it with , "Oh, you're just a pup." Or, "I could be your mother." Or, "You're just a baby." I'm hoping that stops at 30.

2. My gray hair is more justifiable now.

I know a lot of people make a big deal out of 30. I distinctly remember my ex-boyfriend fretting over it. At 26 he was freaking out because he's "on the down-hill slide to 30!"

But there will be no party. No big gifts. (we's too po) No saccharine slide shows.

However, birthdays are a good time to take stock of life.

30 facts in 30 years:

1. Held 19 paying jobs (20 if you count my new position)

2. Had 10 addresses

3. Moved 14 times

4. Lived in 4 states

5. Lived through cancer

6. Had 3 lumps and my tonsils removed

7. Had 4 dogs (two still living)

8. Ran 1 marathon

9. Ran 4 Triathlons

10. Sang in 4 operas

11. Had 5 voice teachers

12. Watched 1 grandparent die

13. Been to 7 countries besides our own (8 if you include Disney World)

14. Had 3 piercings (two of which I regret*)

15. Gotten two tattoos

16. Owned 5 cars (my latest was my birthday present to myself last year and my favorite)

17. Had two long-term relationships

18. Lost, gained, lost and gained a total of 200 lbs.

19. Volunteered at three different camps

20. Stopped believing in the Christian idea of "God."

21. Learned how to tile, cut crown moulding, wire a circuit breaker, change outlets and switches, hang light fixtures, replace faucets and cut trim.

22. Had 3 gardens

23. Discovered that weird feeling wasn't inadequacy, it was queerness.

24. Had 1 personal trainer.

25. Had and have been estranged from 3 best friends.

26. Became an uncle twice over. (Hi Big Mike! Hi Lil Jim!)

27. Learned that people don't all suck.

28. Discovered that I can't always be right.

29. Realized that there are things I can't fix.

30. (and my favorite) Taught over 700 kids about music.

So celebrate in any way you deem appropriate. If you know me from my early years, you may choose to drink jungle juice from a trash can. If you know me from my early-mid 20's, have a beer. If you've known me the last few years, have some wine (but not Merlot. I hate Merlot.)


*A note about those regrettable piercings. They were my nipples. I was going through a phase. They were only in a about year. But they've left my nipples with permanent bumps on the sides of them, like little testes on the sides of my nipples. And they still get infected. At this very moment, my left nipple is swollen and throbbing. Just thought you should know.