me smile pretty

We were talking about Johann Strauss. I can't remember which one, the Jr. or the Sr. Point being, we were talking about a long dead white European.

Of course, my class was made up of half-minority students. And to be fair, we do more than a fair-share of Jazz that I wouldn't usually do. But these old dead white guys cover my walls. Am I racist? God, I hope not. Do I stereotype? You can't be a teacher and NOT stereotype. And not along the racial lines you were all just thinking.

I usually assume that the Asian kids will be good at music. (I have yet to have that stereotype broken.) I usually assume that if their butt-crack is showing over their pants, they're going to be just a bit disrespectful. I assume that the brightest kids in the class are going to get on my nerves because they'll question everything. (but they mostly annoy me because I know it's just karma coming back to haunt me. I WAS that kid.)

I also assume that if I never see a kid smile, that they're not really a happy kid.

So it was disarming, but not surprising, when a eternally sullen 6th grade girl raised her hand. I was assuming she was going to make a snarky remark on the composer at hand. Instead, she asked. "Mr. Hart, Why are you so happy all the time?"

I played the Socratic approach and replied with, "Is it a bad thing to be happy all the time?"

"It's just weird. You're always smiling."

"I'm sorry you don't appreciate my happiness."

And while that's pretty much where it ended, I, like always, thought way too much into it.

I really DO smile all the time. Possibly because, well, let's see: I'm alive, healthy (aside from the athlete's foot), disease free, have a roof over my head, food on the table, money in the bank (however little there is, it's still there), a job I love and a family I love.

Seriously, why shouldn't I smile? Damn it.

But I realized that *I* notice when people smile, too. I notice when the conductor in the orchestra pit is grinning. Hopefully because the tenor finally hit the right notes. I notice when students in my class smile, and hopefully not because they just passed gas.

I also realized, that smiling a lot: not always a good thing.

Two cases: George Bush. Always has that smug grin on his face. I completely understand, though. He has every reason to smile. He's thinking, "Come on, Bitches. Just try to take me down. I'll fuck you up."

Alberto Gonzales. "I can't recall that, but I can recall why I'm smiling this whole time: because you bitches can't touch me. And even if I resign, Big Daddy Bush will make sure I'm taken care of."

So if I get to the point that I'm smiling too much, PLEASE let me know.

It will help prevent the dreaded smile lines in the long run, anyway.